How is that Netflix binge watching going for you? Are you reading this in your pajamas…in the middle of the afternoon?  Rest assured, you are not alone. This world wide Coronavirus pandemic is turning lives upside down. People have lost loved ones, they have lost jobs, there are people wondering how they will buy groceries or pay rent, and there is a general sense of loss of control. Even with all the scientists and researchers working around the clock, no one can tell us when this will end. We don’t know when we can return to work, when we can see our friends, and that uncertainty, that mystery end point, is frightening.

Not being able to go out to your favorite bars or restaurants, not being able to sit around chatting with all your friends, not being able to go shopping or to the movies, not being able to go to work and earn a living, yeah those limitations are frustrating. I know, because I’ve lived this before. I couldn’t do any of those things the first year of my brain injury recovery, and a lot of them took several years to get back. This time around things are different though. Yes, I’m stuck isolated at home, not working, but at least now I can read and watch TV. If you feel like you are going insane stuck at home, try spending a full day at home alone without looking at a TV, computer, phone, or even a book. Okay, no, don’t do that, I promise it is horrible, just take my word for it.

For me, the hardest parts about all of this are the sadness of losing the life I just got back and returning to isolation. I spent 4 years recovering from a traumatic brain injury, and my husband and I finally felt that our lives were back on track. I was working part-time and able to do most things again (although among other things I still can’t go to the movies or drive far on the highway). If I learned anything from my past experience it is that in times of uncertainty, when life feels upside down, it can be immensely helpful to set a goal. Taking control of one aspect of your life, no matter how small, can have powerful emotional benefits.

Shortly after my brain injury, I decided that I wanted to do the Run Rabbit Run 100 miler. Of course the idea was ludicrous, because I couldn’t even run. Hell, at that point, I couldn’t walk around the block without stopping to rest, but it was 12 months away, and I needed something to work towards.  Besides, the doctors told me I would be better in a few weeks, so I would have plenty of time. They were wrong however, and weeks turned into months and years. I had no control over the timeline of my recovery, and never knew if and when life might return to normal. Training for a 100 mile race gave me a goal. It gave my days structure, and gave me a reason to get up and out of bed.

Setting that goal gave me something to work towards, and allowed me to actually see progress! My recovery was so painfully slow that I often didn’t notice the tiny improvements, and the constant backsliding was maddening. In contrast – I could see my watch tick over to show I had run that first full mile! I could see that I could finally run to the top of that hill. I started focusing more on my training and the things I could control. There was a feeling of pride in my accomplishments that helped me keep going day after day.

For years I have written about my experiences with brain injury recovery on this blog. I’ve talked about starting a goal setting project for other people, and I’ve always called it “What Is Your 100?” Not everyone needs to run 100 miles (seriously, it hurts a lot), and it isn’t a great time to be pushing your training to that level, as it can cause suppression of your immune system, but we can all set goals. It doesn’t have to be a huge audacious crazy goal, it can be something simple. So what is YOUR 100? What goal will you set to get you through this period of confinement?

Need some inspiration? Here are some ideas:

1. Go for a walk or run every day for the next 100 days.
2. Call one friend every day for the next month.
3. Meditate daily for 100 days, or maybe for 100 hours over a certain timeline.
4. Train to run a 5k, 10k, or distance of your choice. Do this on your own, or sign up for a virtual race.
5. Look at some maps and come up with a list of 10 adventure routes to explore.
6. Write 100 thank you notes to people who have made a difference in your life.
7. Learn to knit or crochet (there are lots of YouTube videos on this!)
8. Do walk/run intervals 5 days a week and work up to your first full mile of running.
9. Work up to 100 seconds of plank, or 100 push-ups. Or if you are me – maybe just 10 legit pushups.
10. Use Duolingo or another foreign language app every day for the next 100 days.

I could keep going, but you get the idea. Many people have been dealing with fear, anxiety, and depression recently. If you are struggling right now that is okay, take some baby steps. Maybe your goal is to set your alarm and get out of bed every morning before 7am until quarantine is over. Or to get out of your pajamas and put on real clothes every day.

I hope you take a little time to think about some great options. Here is the important part – picking the goal isn’t enough. You need to take a few more steps.

First, state the goal.

Write it down, post it on social media, tell a friend. Take some step to make it official in your mind.

Second, set yourself up for success.

Do you have all the tools to reach the goal? For instance, do you need to download an app, or buy supplies online, or find some way to log your progress?

Third, create a plan.

Literally write out a schedule on your calendar or make a checklist. It feels good to cross something off your list and to hold yourself accountable for each step along the way to reaching the goal! Make sure to give yourself a start date and the day you plan to reach your goal.

The world is in turmoil. Take back a little bit of control by setting a goal for yourself. Running a 100 mile race didn’t fix my brain injury, but focusing on that goal and training for the race got me through that first year. There may be setbacks, and plans never seem to go exactly as planned, but the process and discipline of working towards your goal can give you a little life raft to hang on to during these uncertain times. Send this to a friend or a family member. Encourage them to pick a goal. Cheer each other on and encourage each other to keep working towards your goals.

When I was training for that first 100 miler, I lived by the motto:

“Do not let what you cannot do interfere with what you can do”

That couldn’t be anything more appropriate for the current situation. Yes, we have lost a lot, but there is still so much we CAN do.  So tell me – what is your 100?

Stay healthy and let’s all do our part to get through this together.

-Kristin